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Having Sex Naked

March 2, 2021 by Vixen

Now I know what you’re thinking, ‘who doesn’t have sex naked?’ Apparently, there are a lot of people who feel like it is more comfortable having sex in the cover of dark, blankets, or even clothing. This is considered a normal behavior and it leads them to wondering what if they were naked. Or better yet, what is the appeal of being naked during sex?

 However, sometimes being naked isn’t about sex. You have to learn to be comfortable with your body and embracing nudity is a great way to explore and learn to love your body. There are many activities you can do while naked that aren’t sexually related. Some of them more comical than anything, like naked twister. Although, that usually leads to a sexual situation or two.  

Finding Comfort in your Body

 So you’re naked, now what? Well, now you reflect on your body and pick out things you like about it. Be it your hair, breasts, penis, or whatever you love about your body. Take note of it and really praise those features. Looking at the good of our naked flesh is a great way to become confident and comfortable while you are naked.

 Even practicing nudity with your partner, walking about the house, is a great way to grow a bond and find a way to love one another’s body without there being a sexual intention or barrier. Play games, cuddle, do household chores. Just do your everyday activities naked, indoors of course. It is important to embrace this practice to find the comfort you seek. 

One activity you can have while naked with your partner is taking a sensual bath or shower together. It can be a nonsexual activity that is still intimate as well as informative. You really get to learn your partner’s body as you help them suds up and wash off. Just the closeness and the couple bond to be comfortable enough to feel vulnerable like that with your partner.

 Why Get Naked for Sex

 Some find it inconvenient fully undressing for sexual affairs, however that is only really appropriate for fuck buddies and flings. Let’s face it, it is hard to be intimate with your partner while your zipper is scraping the hell out of your erection. Clothes create a barrier that lessens the bond that forms when two people are truly intimate with one another. Loving your partner’s body, as well as your own, is essential for a healthy sexual relationship and should not be scoffed at in the slightest.

 Aside from intimacy, other people undress for sex to increase arousal of their partner. Usually in the case of women for men. A sexy strip tease, slow dance, or a sexy peep show is sometimes what it takes to get your partner really going. Undressing for sex is something you can do alone, or do with your partner to add to the mood.

 Naked with Clothes On

 It is possible to be fully naked during sex while being full, or even partially, clothed. It is the concept of being emotionally naked to your partner. A spiritual nudity if you will. When you are emotionally naked, and vulnerable to your partner, you instill a level of trust between the two of you. Saying I love you, gentle touches, embracing the fact that this person before you are closer to you than anyone else. That is the level of naked that matters more than nudity. Intimacy is about the closeness you have with that special partner. You need to be spiritually and emotionally naked for intimacy to be fully appreciated.

Whether you enjoy sex with or without clothes, if you want to have sex naked, clear of restraint and restrictions, be open with your partner. Explore your body, explore your partner’s body, and most importantly explore their emotional connection with you. It is time we embrace each other’s nakedness of mind, body, and soul. Find he strength to peel off the layers of more than just your clothes. It can be redeeming to find that comfort and connection with someone else, and this is the best way to reach that next level. Nudity is more than sex; it is sensual and vulnerable.

Swing into action with a sex swing

Filed Under: Blog

Cramps Saved Me From A Horrible First Date

February 27, 2021 by Vixen

I woke up this morning with that feeling that Aunt Flo was fixing to kick me in the pelvis all day. I haven’t had cramps this bad since a few years back. I am not the type of back out of plans and today was a first date with a guy that I met on Craigslist. He sounded fun and now that I have went back, I missed some warning signs. Our starting conversations were good. We were both kinky, so I invited him for coffee. I offered to meet him in his town, which was an hour away. First mistake made.

It was hotter where he lived then my mildly humid area. It was going to be a struggle for me to get through this date, but it was too late to back out. Second Mistake made.

I parked my car down the street from Starbucks, hoping that the walking would help. It didn’t. I was ordering my coffee and holding onto the counter for support. The caffeine, sugar and milk mixture were not a help. We sit down and started talking, covering all the normal points. I asked why he moved here, and then he went on this long rant about it being cheaper and how he would rather live somewhere else. Then he went on about how elderly dog is passed away and how he adopted a new pet but took it to the ASPCA to have it checked out. At this point I politely excuse myself stating that I wasn’t feeling well. He agreed. I went home.

That was the day that my cramps saved me from a huge mistake.

Sex Pillow – Sex Wedge Guide

Filed Under: Blog

CollarMe aka CollarSpace

February 23, 2021 by Vixen

CollarMe was recently rebranded to be called CollarSpace and it is an online network for those who are interested in the BDSM lifestyle. The main foundation of this site is SSC which is Safe, Sane and Consensual. It has advertised itself as being a safe space where a person will not be discriminated and that all boundaries are respected. It gets over 500,000 visitors each month and most of them are from the United States. This is a huge community for like-minded people.

Even though there are some profiles that have been inactive for a number of years, there is a list of currently online members located on the homepage. There are still real people looking for real relationships, but it seems like you have to weed through the thousands upon thousands of Findommes or dominatrixes who are all about financial domination and a lot of dead profiles.

When you go to join, you just put in the needed details and you are then sent to Alt.com which is an affiliate link. This is annoying and it could be confusing for someone who isn’t tech savvy. Then before you can do anything you have to wait for your account to be reviewed which takes 2 to 3 days.

Contacting people is easy. Just favorite them or send a message or you can use the chatroom. You have to have Java installed but it does work. Your profile can be filled with a bunch of useful information like interests and skills. Overall its not a bad website, but the bots and money hungry women can be a turn off.

Filed Under: Blog

Bi Visibility Day

February 20, 2021 by Vixen

Okay, so you may be asking what Bi Visibility Day is. That’s completely normal and it is at this point that I have been made obligated to tell you what it is. Basically this is a single day out of the whole year where you announce to the world that you are Bisexual and you get to deal with all the random invasive questions about liking both boys and girls or if you want to join your buddy and his wife in a threesome where your sexual preferences have no say so.

Even though I may have defined myself as being a lesbian or even bi starting in my teen years, over the last decade or so, that sense of sexual orientation that everyone has, I let go. This is something that feels amazing and let’s face it, it is no one’s business to know who you are sleeping with.

I date both women and men, even though its easier to date men because I am beyond lazy and its easier to find someone in the dating pool. But the label of being bi does get on my nerves. There isn’t anything wrong with the word, but I have found that it creates a bunch of questions that just continue on and on like the song that never ends. Even though I have given answers, questions still keep on coming at me.

I am not in the state of mind or at the age where I have to be interested in playing teacher in Sexual Orientation 101. I don’t have an interest in sleeping with you while your partner watches.

I get that Bi Visibility Day is about being able to put a stop to some of the actual stupidity that comes with being bisexual, but at this point, I am too old to deal with it and I gave up using the word.

I will just go on in life and do who and what I want to do. If a person asks me, I often just say that I am queer. If they want an explanation, I just say that I am easy. I don’t feel an obligation to put my sexuality into a tiny box with a label. I don’t have to explain myself to anyone but myself.

I understand that this approach is a bit simplistic and it won’t work with everyone, but this is what works for me.

Lovense Lush and Lovense Lush 2 Review

Filed Under: Blog

Adult Sexual Education Awareness Month

February 16, 2021 by Vixen

We are all about having sex positive celebrations. As May was Masturbation Month, it is best to head up on the bandwagon and celebrate Adult Sex Education Month. This is something that everyone should believe in. Adult Sex Ed is what it is all about. Bobbie Morgan, the founder of A Good Woman’s Dirty Mind and creator of Adult Sex Ed month. She was a successful sex blogger and she was the reason that this celebration was created. However, she has passed away, but her teachings are something that will keep moving forward.

Bobbie truly believed that there was a need for culture change in how people talk about sex. The embarrassment and shame needed to be taken out of the equation and that there was a lot more room for credible and intelligent information about sex. What she started helped to create the conversations around sexual education for adults. The aim was to bring sex educators, bloggers, sex journalists and the sex industry together and boost the word about healthy communication about sex and provide a place for credible, intelligent and blunt information about it for adults.

Bobbie’s voice is no longer out there pushing us to communicate in cyberspace anymore and she is going to be missed and it is a shame that she isn’t around to see what she started, but Adult Sex Ed month is going to keep happening and there will always be plenty of educational content for adults in the world of sex.

Filed Under: Blog

Sex Pillow – Sex Wedge Guide

January 20, 2020 by Vikki Vines

Have you tried just about every position that you can think of and even those that you have found on the internet with your partner in bed? Why not take a chance and explore the world of sex pillows which are a type of sex furniture? Sex pillows and sex swings are the most popular type of sex furniture.  A sex pillow will not only make your sex life a bit better and a little more exotic, but it will also add some comfort for both you and your partner.

Let’s face it there are some positions that we do for partners that can be uncomfortable, but with a sex pillow, it can help to relieve some of that pressure and pain in your muscles and joints from the weird positions that you can think of.

shock

Okay so what is a sex pillow and what does a sex pillow do? It is basically a special type of pillow that was designed for you to use during various sexual positions. They come in all sorts of shapes but the most common shape for a sex pillow is a wedge that’s why a sex pillow can be called a sex wedge as well.  Some people when they think of a sex pillow think of something like this:

 

 

But no, they generally look like this:

sex wedge

sex wedge

Why buy a sex wedge?

Most people never really consider getting a sex pillow until that moment when sex becomes uncomfortable and begins to hurt. It is especially bad for those who have memory foam beds. If you have back pain, these sex pillows are going to be a god send.  Basically, it doesn’t matter if you have mobility issues or you are just looking to spice up your sex life a bit, you certainly will not go wrong when you invest in a good sex pillow.

These products are going to turn all your favorite positions into the best feeling ever as it removes the strain on your:

  • shoulders
  • hips
  • waist
  • back

Not to mention that they can help you to explore more adventurous positions that you have never been able to do and even add more depth and sensation to your already great sex life.

How to use a wedge pillow for sex:
the wheelbarrow

grab and go

home on the range

elevated oral

the push up

the rodeo

the over easy

the over easy

the down low

If the above positions don’t get your heart racing at least a little, nothing will.

 

Sex Pillow – what to consider when buying one

When it comes to choosing a great sex pillow there are a few things that you will want to check out, especially if it is your first time purchasing one. You could get overwhelmed by how many options there are on the market. Don’t freak out, as just look for these factors to help you to find the right type of sex pillow for you and your partner, or just for you as sex pillows also make masturbation quite fun.

sex wedge

sex wedge

Think about the size

Sex pillows can be put into 2 categories: wedges and ramps. Ramps are going to be bigger pieces that were made to support your lower torso and entire back, however you can use them in a variety of ways. Wedges are much smaller sex pillows that are meant to add support to certain areas like raising your butt up to allow your partner to penetrate you much deeper when in missionary position.

Now not all ramps and wedges are going to be the same size. They make some that are so large that they take up a heck of a lot of space on the bed, and there are others that are so small that you can discretely hide them under your bed. It is really up to you to figure out what size you are looking for based on your preferences and needs.

Check out material types

Many sex pillows come with 2 parts: the cover and the foam. You are going to want to pick a pillow that is made with a medical grade foam or a high-quality foam. This helps to ensure that you will have a comfortable and soft pillow that is firm enough to give you plenty of support.

Now the cover, is normally made from microfiber and there are some pillows that will come with velvet or other fabric covers. You will want to pick a fabric that can be easily removed and throw in your washer for easy cleaning. Also look for brands that give you a waterproof liner for your foam. This is perfect as it helps to protect your foam from massage oils, lubricants, various liquids and your own body fluids from ruining the foam. This helps your sex pillow to last much longer.

Check out the design

There are some sex wedges and ramps that have just a slope that is pretty plain, then you have the models that have gentle curves. It is up to you on which one will fit your needs. If you have a decent budget, check out both models to see which one will give you the most pleasure during your sexcapades.

Is it portable?

Let’s be honest, some of us travel a lot so ask yourself are your going to need to bring your sex pillow with you or can you just leave it at home. There are some sex pillows that are way to heavy to carry around and are designed to be used at home only, while there are some that are inflatable and can be placed in your suitcase or purse when you are traveling.

Best Sex Pillows for 2020

Okay! Now that you have most of the basics about sex pillows, let’s get shopping for one. You can explore the list below which are great models that you can use. They are the best options that are on the market right now and are highly rated by those who have purchased and used them.

24 Inch Ramp/Wedge Combo by Liberator

Liberator wedge-ramp combo

Liberator wedge-ramp combo

When it comes to sex pillows, this is the Cadillac of models. There are a lot of reasons that it is called the best. Everyone loves the feelings that come with using this model. It is made from a high-density foam and covered with a microfiber cover and it feels super soft. When you have sex on it, you will notice that the sensations from laying on it and being explored make it much more intense.

showerhead

The shape of this sex pillow is certainly something that will give you plenty of options to try out especially if you are planning to use the Kama Sutra as way to get more adventurous. The two pieces can work on their own or together when it is needed. Just let your imagination run wild and enjoy the wild ride that you are going to receive on this pillow.

Benefits of the Liberator Wedge/Ramp Combo

  • Great for missionary and doggy-style positions
  • Helps make position transitions feel effortless
  • Great for plus-size and differing size lovers
  • Lets you try sex on the floor or off-the-bed
  • Cover has an advanced microfiber fabric that causes less slipping and keeps shapes stuck together
  • Provides angles that make the belly look smaller and the penis look larger

https://www.liberator.com/wedge-ramp-combo.html

https://www.liberator.com/wedge.html

Jaz Positioning Pillow by Liberator

If you are not a really heavy person, and you are looking for a bit of variety in sex, then you will love this product. The Jaz is ranked second in rankings. Just take a look at the design of it and really think of all the things that you could do with it. I bet you just started blushing at all the naughty things that just popped into your head. If not, we can throw some suggestions out there for you.

Liberator Jaz

Liberator Jaz

You can do everything from vanilla missionary to doggy and even make it easier for oral on you or your partner. The oval shape of this wedge is perfect for oral and that means giving and receiving. But let’s face it we are all about receiving than giving. The best part of this pillow, is that you can set it for your height, favorite position and variations. Not to mention the price that really helps to take the cake.

https://www.liberator.com/jaz.html

Sex Pillow for Couples by Toughage

Toughage inflatable sex pillow - cylindrical

Toughage inflatable sex pillow – cylindrical

Are you a big fan of anal sex? Or you are wanting to surprise your partner with it sometime? This pillow is one of the best pillows out there for basically any position that your nasty mind can come up with. But the magic of this pillow really happens when you start thinking about anal sex.

cleaning

It is a specialized wedge-shaped pillow that is made from some high-grade foam that is super easy to clean, and that goes for the cover as well and it is easy to store because of the shape and size. The wedge shape really holds plenty of options for both you and your partner. So, the worries about reaching maximum penetration are now going to be a think of the past with this great sex pillow. Besides using this pillow for sex, you can also use it in your daily life. It doesn’t even look like a sex pillow. You can use it to rest on and even to give you some support when you are reading books in bed. The versatility of this pillow makes it a multipurpose pillow for sex and your home.

https://www.amazon.com/Toughage-Cylindrical-Inflatable-Portable-cylindricals/dp/B00XKJVMI2

PF3101 Inflatable Sex Pillow for Couples by Toughage

Toughage inflatable sex pillow - PF3101

Toughage inflatable sex pillow – PF3101

If you are a traveler and like to have some fun with your partner or someone else, we aren’t judging, this pillow is one of those products that you can pack up and take with you without people ever knowing what it is until it is inflated. This sex pillow has plenty of perks. It is safe and soft for people of all ages. The foam is elastic enough to keep bouncing back the strokes given for a long time. It can also handle plenty of weight. This is one of those pillows that works for just about anyone.

https://www.amazon.com/Toughage-PF3101-Inflatable-Pillow-Couples/dp/B01N1EW6S2

Dame Products Pillo

Another popular option out there is the Pillo by Dame Products.

Also:

  • Fetish Fantasy Inflatable Sex Position Master
  • DOMINIX Deluxe Inflatable Sex Position Ramp

 

Sex Pillow Wrap Up

Now that you have been through which pillows can rock your world that are on the market right now and you have some information about what to look for, it is up to you to get out there and find the sex pillow of your dreams.

 

 

Filed Under: Blog, Reviews

How to Make Fake Cum

January 15, 2020 by Vikki Vines

This is a pretty interesting article since there isn’t a lot of information about this online. But, it’s vital for women that are interested in and regularly using a squirting dildo. Those dildos require the ammunition which can turn out to be very expensive if you start buying from those fancy manufacturers. Those big bottles of cum might look like the real juice, but they certainly will take a big chunk from your purse. So, in order to save you your hard-earned money and still come up with a liquid you can use in your dildos, we came up with a recipe that could possibly make your life so much more easier. We can’t really guarantee how well it takes since some of the stuff used is pretty bitter, but the looks, feel and texture of the end result, given you follow the instructions the right way, will definitely exceed your expectations. Let’s get into the recipe for crème de la penis!

Fake Cum Recipe

Required Ingredients

There aren’t a lot of things required. The ingredients are just basic household eatable items that you’re going to find in your fridge. Components required to create about a glass full of cum are:

  • Eggs (one)
  • Sour Cream (1 tablespoon) / Yogurt
  • Corn Starch (2 tablespoons)
  • Salt (To taste; seems weird saying this with a recipe to make cum)
  • Water (Just a cup)

Method

Well, we’re not exactly on the set of the next MasterChef, but yeah, we’re still going to pretend this is a Gordon Ramsay recipe book and label this paragraph as “The Recipe”. It may seem corny, but the way you’re going to prepare fake cum will seem like you’re just about to prepare a Sunday brunch. Before we create more similarities between fake cum and edible foods, we should move on to the recipe.

So, we’re only going to be working with the five key ingredients listed above. The fake cum recipe is fairly simple. You start of by boiling a cup of water in a pot. Bring that up to a light simmer and start adding the rest of the ingredients. You’re going to want to start off with the corn starch. Add 2 tablespoons of the corn starch. Cook the mixture on a medium stove and keep stirring. The corn starch should start mixing up and getting thick in about 2-3 minutes. Once the mixture is no longer runny, take the pot off the stove. Now, it’s time to ask rest of the goodies to your fantastic pot of cum (for the record, it was quite difficult to avoid the phrase ‘cumtastic’).

At this point, you can add the egg and start stirring your mixture once again. Make sure you’re really thorough because those egg whites can be challenging to mix completely. Then add a teaspoon of sour cream, and you guessed it, keep on stirring. At this point, your mixture is going to start looking like the real deal. The only thing left to do is add some salt. A pinch should be enough, but you’re free to use as much as you deem appropriate.

Taste Test

Yeah, we’re not going to lie. This cum isn’t going to taste very good. Sure, it can be considered edible but if you had two choices; drink this cum or die of thirst, you’re probably going to choose the second. However, cum isn’t going to be too delicious, is it? It’s supposed to taste weird and if that weirdness is what you’re looking for, then our recipe will more than satisfy. If prepared right, the egg you mixed in will make you gag and achieve the true purpose of swallowing cum (yeah, don’t quote us on this one).

Best Fake Cum

This is just a homemade recipe, if you’re looking for something that comes out of the box and is actually pretty good then we have a few products that are going to be loads better (pun definitely intended) than any homemade cum.

Master Series Jizz

Master Series Jizz

Master Series Jizz

This is probably the best fake cum you can purchase on the market. The real notable feature of this product is the scent. No one will ever say this, but the fragrance of this cum is absolutely amazing and just like the actual stuff. The texture is also spot on, it’s thick and not too thick at the same time. The fluid is water based, meaning that it can work with all silicone toys. The look and smell might be amazing, but word of warning, it’s not a good idea to swallow this cum. It tastes absolutely horrendous.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Water-Based-Semen-Scented/dp/B00E1Q8RMC

Bad Dragon Cum Lube

Bad Dragon Cum Lube

Bad Dragon Cum Lube

The Bad Dragon is a great product for folks that want to be absolutely drenched in cum. It comes in a huge container and is great for bukkake and every related to it. The product is unscented and is really easy on sensitive skin. You should definitely purchase the Bad Dragon is skin allergies are a concern for you.

 

Similar to the Master Jizz, Bad Dragon is water-based which makes it compatible with most sex toys.

https://bad-dragon.com/products/cumlube

Squirtz Cum Lube

Squirtz is another popular option in the world of fake semen. This product by CyberSkin is water-based but it can last a much longer than any other water-based tube. You could even use it as lubrication and it’ll do an amazing job.

Squirtz Cum Lube

Squirtz Cum Lube

Just like the Bad Dragon, Squirtz is easy on the skin plus it’s a piece of cake to clean. However, one added feature of the Squirtz is that it has the component of taste down as well. The liquid tastes a lot like cum, is completely unscented and looks a whole lot like that beautiful cum too. So, overall, if you’re looking for the closest thing to actual semen, then the Squirtz is the best option for you on this list.

https://simplipleasure.com/products/squirtz-cum-lube-unscented-63-fl-oz

Spunk Lube also have a great product as well.

Filed Under: Blog

Where’s my head at?

May 9, 2019 by Vikki Vines

The last 6-12 months I haven’t been anywhere near as active on the blog as I would have liked.  Basically I took a bit of a hiatus.  I had so much going on in my life that I didn’t have the emotional or mental energy to deal with the blog.  At some stages in life you have more going on than others and it turns out that the last 6-12 months were super hectic for me.  Nonetheless I’ve come out the other end I feel a better person.  Having said that I’ve definitely become more cynical and have a harder edge but that’s life.

What I’ve learnt is that you really have to enjoy the great times because they won’t last forever. You also need to understand that there will be tough stages in life also.  We all go through them but it’s important to just keep on fighting on.

How it has impacted my sexuality is that my sex drive decreased.  Over the last couple of months I feel that my sex drive has slowly been coming back though and now it’s as big as ever.  These things take time and life is all about momentum, change doesn’t happen in an instant.  It took months to get to feel like myself again but I’m back now and feel that I’m myself again.

Going forward I can’t wait to explore my sexuality more with vibrators, dildos and some kinkier stuff like butt play.  Who knows ho kinky I’ll get?  The journey will be a lot of fun and there’ll be plenty of orgasms along the way so stay tuned.

Filed Under: Blog

How to Use a Vibrator

May 8, 2019 by Vikki Vines

First off, let us just reassure you once and for all that there is nothing wrong with not knowing how to use a vibrator. We may live in a world where Fifty Shades of Grey has become an integral part of pop-culture references but it has started to make things which should come with a caution label look easy and second nature, so much so that most women have started judging themselves for simply not knowing how to use one. What they forget is what turns you on is purely based on instinct. It’s really a method of trial and error, you learn what you like based on instinct and then you go on there.

But, if you’re still wondering how to use a vibrator, then here are eight steps that can help you along the way.

1. Be confident

There’s no shame in wanting to explore your sexuality.  It’s all about enjoying yourself.  Orgasming and exploring your sexuality are some of the biggest pleasures in life and you shouldn’t feel any shame or guilt in using a vibrator.  In fact, you should be super excited because you’re on a journey of self discovery…  The best type of self discovery, the type that leads to lots and lots of orgasms!

2.     Know What Your Vibrator is designed for…

The first thing you need to do as soon as you get a vibrator is to figure out exactly what it is designed to do. Vibrators tend to come in all shapes and sizes, with some being multi-purpose, while others are designed for one specific reason. The purpose of vibrators these days range from basic internal stimulation, clitoral stimulation and to stimulate both the clitoris and g-spot at the same time (generally called rabbit vibrators).

Once you have figured out the purpose of your vibrator, it is time to get to know how your vibrator actually works. In order to do this, you need to understand the various vibration intensities and patterns the vibrator is accompanied with. These are responsible for the pulsating of the vibrator and will play a key role using your vibrator. Most vibrators also come with instruction manuals. Thus, it is always a good idea to thoroughly read the manual before you dive into the deep end with the toy.  Looking up instructions online will also prove to be a good thing because the more knowledge you have on a topic, the chances of you being nervous decrease significantly. While you are at it, it might also be a good idea to look up product reviews online as well. This way you get to see how your toy performed for other users and that would give you an idea about how you can use it too.

3.     Get in the Mood

Once you have acquired all the knowledge that you can get about your toy, it is time to dive into actually using it. But, the first thing you have got to do is get yourself in the mood to play with yourself. The pulsations produced by vibrators tend to be extremely intense. Thus, keep yourself from getting uncomfortable and play with your new toy only when you are extremely ready to go ahead and get yourself some or start off on the lowest possible setting. If it’s still too much vibration for you use the vibrator on top of your panties to help decrease the vibration level.

Do whatever you need to do to get your pulse-rate going, read erotica, put on some porn, fantasize, as long as it gets your blood flowing, it is good enough to get you in the mood. Now, once you have done what you needed to do, turn the vibrator on. It’s not time just yet to put it between your legs and go to town with it. But, it certainly is a good idea to tease yourself with the toy on various parts of your body, just to familiarize yourself with the sensation your toy produces.

4.     Lots of Lube

Whether you are playing with a vibrator, having sex or simply masturbating, using a whole lot of lube is the way to go if you’re using an internal vibrator.  It not only helps the toy glide against your skin, keeping the tugging and scratching sensation at bay, but the sort of sensations it produces give you a whole new territory to explore. You can use any sort of lube you would like. Most recommend using a high-quality water-based lube, but you should always look up what kind of lube works best with your toy. As a rule of the thumb, always remember. Do not use silicone based lubes for toys made with silicone.

5.     Go Slow

If you are a first-time user, trust us when we say this: using a vibrator directly on your genitals on full power setting is calling for disaster. Turn the power settings on the vibrator on the lowest, using the basic pattern i.e. a constant vibration instead of a pulsing one for the start. Eventually, once you familiarize yourself with the toy or you have been playing with it for a while, you can increase the power setting and experiment with what feels good to you. But, until you are sure of what you want, it is always a good idea to ease into it.

6.     Level of Contact

Most women like to have the vibrator in direct contact with their clitoris. Others prefer a barrier of sort between the two like panties. It can be anything really. You can choose to hold the vibrator against the labia so that your clitoris gets stimulated indirectly. Or, you can keep your underwear on and try stimulating the clitoris with the vibrator. You can also use a sheet or a towel to achieve similar effects.

7.     Stimulate your Hot Spots

As mentioned earlier, most vibrators are designed for one exclusive purpose, or to use externally. Since most women need direct clitoral stimulation to climax, it makes the most sense to get yourself a vibrator that works externally. But, at the same time, you can choose to purchase one that works with internal stimulation so you can play with your erogenous zones and see what works for you. Most women prefer the in and out motion, which helps in G-spot stimulation. With the G-spot situated right underneath your abdomen, even the slightest pressure on the area can help you with your adventures.

8.     Experiment

So, there you have it. Once you have a grip on all the basics, it’s time that you start mixing things up and experiment with what you like and how you like it. Increase the intensity, decrease it, add a pulsing pattern to the mix, do whatever works for you and see what you like best.

And, do not forget to have fun!

Filed Under: Blog

Anal Beads

January 21, 2019 by Vikki Vines

Individual sexual choices and lifestyles vary greatly from person to person and when exploring sex and sexuality what will do it for one may be a total turn-off for another.  Anal play has been practiced by humans for thousands of years.  The ancient Romans, Egyptians and Greeks were fascinated by it.  It is thought that the first use of beads for sex play was by Cleopatra who also had images depicted of her using a dildo.  Olive oil was commonly used as a lubricant and Petronius a Roman courtier 27-66AD wrote in his novel:

“Oenothea held up a leather dildo which she oiled and covered in pepper and crushed nettle seeds and began pushing it up my arsehole, inch by inch.”

With anal play growing in popularity throughout history, people can now buy anal beads at sex toy stores.  With this in mind I wanted to explore the practices of anal play through the use of anal beads.

What are anal beads?

Anal beads are sex toys that consist of multiple spheres, balls and other circular or cylindrical shapes that are held together to form a line that is inserted into the anus to give erotic pleasure.  The most popular are tapered in size the end bit (the side you insert first) being the smallest and increasing in size with each ball.  Other variations may be all the same size or randomly different sizes.  These balls may be held together by a string (Thai beads) or the same material as the balls whether that is rubber, plastic, latex, glass, silicone or steel.  Anal beads may be vibrating or non-vibrating.

anal beads

Curved anal beads are very common

Versatility is the beauty of anal beads as they can be used in solo play, foreplay, couples play and as a prelude or conclusion to anal sex.  They can also be used either by men who will stimulate their prostate and achieve a ‘P-spot orgasm’ or by women who do not have a prostate but would like to experience ‘anal orgasms’.  The smaller sizes can be used for beginners of anal play.  Another option for beginners to anal play is butt plugs.  You can read about my first adventure with anal and butt plugs here.

rigid anal beads

Another popular type of anal beads are rigid, straight anal beads

They’ve also been really popular in popular culture as evidenced by these two clips:

 

How to use anal beads

The most common way for women to use them is to slowly insert them, stopping as each bead passes through the narrow sphincters in the anus.  As the balls increase it will cause dilation until the largest size is reached.  Some women will repeat this procedure whilst others will then move the beads inwards and outwards increasing speed to simulate real anal sex.  Men will insert the beads into the anus until the Prostate gland is found.  Then they will stimulate it by moving it backwards and forwards over the prostate to cause an ejaculation.  This method is called ‘milking the prostate’.

Another method that is very popular with Thai Beads is to fully insert the string and balls. Then lightly jiggle the string with slight pressure that will cause each ball to ‘pop’ out of the anus. When the ball or bead is between the internal and external sphincter muscles it will cause constriction of the anus.

Couples play

During couples sex anal beads are often introduced just prior to the woman orgasming vaginally. This will intensify the orgasm and in many cases women report having intense blended orgasms.  A blended orgasm is when an orgasm is experienced simultaneously from two different parts of the body.  Women can achieve orgasm from the clitoris, labia, vagina, G-spot, A-spot and anally as a result of stimulation or penetration. Men experience orgasms from the penis and the Prostate.

Will you enjoy it?

Rather than just using the anal beads on their own, they can also be inserted into the vagina or anus during penetrative sex. If you are planning on using anal beads in this way it is recommended that the anal beads have a method of retrieval that will not be dislodged during penetration. When the anal beads of fully inserted, a lover can insert their erection or dildo inside and gently thrust. The anal beads will move alongside the thrusts for additional stimulation.

Use lube!

 

lube

You’ll need lube

As with any sexual activity revolving around the anus plenty of lubricant should be used.  The anus does not self-lubricate and also absorbs water so re-application is often required.  Also if any part of the anal beads is porous, like the string, attention to disinfection and cleaning of the sex toy before and after each use is imperative to ensure safety.  Any anal toys should not be shared, but if they are precautions such as placing a condom over it and using anti-bacterial spray should be used.

Anal Beads Wrap up

There is a high concentration of nerve endings in and around the anus that will allow intense sexual enjoyment when using anal beads if done properly.  The pudendal nerve in the external sphincter muscle actually branches to the dorsal nerve of the clitoris in women and the penis in men.  This is why many fetishes are known to include anal beads to heighten sexual desire and/or gratification during intimate play.  More popular ones include ass worship, enema play, BDSM, spanking, cuckold play, pegging and of course anal sex.

Filed Under: Blog

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